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How to Pray for Your Tween Daughter
Adolescence has a variety of trying ages, but I’d wager tweenhood is one of the biggest. While the age of when a child becomes a tween varies between 8 and 10, the cutoff is entering the teen years at 13. In fact, dictionary.com says a tween is “considered too old to be a child and too young to be a teenager.”
That alone is a sure sign tweenhood is rife with challenges and struggles. Our children are aching to grow up, but they aren’t quite there. With a daughter who turned 13 just a few months ago, I have very recently been in this phase of life. (In fact, with a son who is 10, I’m still in the phase on the boy side of things!)
Tween girls are tough. I could see the little girl in my daughter and the young woman in my daughter within the same 15 minutes. It’s tricky terrain to navigate for our daughters and for us as parents. And that’s why it’s important to know how to pray for your tween daughter.
The importance of prayer
Your prayers for your daughter don’t shift into something completely different the moment you feel she’s become a tween. But we do need to realize our babies are growing up, and they have different needs than before. As Christian moms and dads, we want to make sure we are covering them in prayer for every facet of life.
The Bible tells us in Jeremiah 29:11 that God has a plan, a hope, and a future for our children. Our prayers can help them find their way down the right path to lead to those things and avoid pitfalls.
Continuing in Jeremiah 29, we learn even more about the power and importance of prayer: “Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”
Jeremiah 29:12-13 (NIV)
We can call on, go to and pray to our Heavenly Father regarding our tween daughters, and He will listen. It’s an awesome power and responsibility.
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Pray for her self-worth
“For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.”
Psalms 139:13-14 (NIV)
The tween years are difficult for our daughters. They are growing and changing physically in all new ways. Perhaps they start noticing physical signs of beauty in the world and start doubting their own worth. It’s easy for our girls to feel like they don’t measure up or aren’t good enough.
So, we need to pray for our tween daughters and their self-worth. She is valued and loved by God. He tells us that each of us was fearfully and wonderfully made from the very beginning of our creation. I like to remind my children God doesn’t make junk, and God made them, so they are valuable.
Try this prayer for your tween daughter:
“Heavenly Father, I ask that you be with my daughter and remind her of her value and self-worth in you. Help her to see past surface beauty into the heart and know she is beautiful in every way, just as you made her. Protect her from spirits of deceit and harm who whisper lies to her. Help her to feel, know and embrace the worth she has as a daughter of the King. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Pray for her friends
“The righteous choose their friends carefully, but the way of the wicked leads them astray.”
Proverbs 12:26 (NIV)
During the tween years, kiddos start to pay attention more to what others think. They are more likely to feel embarrassed now than ever before. Tweens value the opinions of their friends.
Having the right friends is important because making the wrong friends can lead our daughters astray. And we certainly don’t want that.
Try this prayer for your tween daughter:
“Dear God, surround my daughter with the right friends and people. Place good, Godly friends and examples in her life for her to follow. Give her wisdom to know who the right friends are for her, and give her strength to stand up again those who have wrong intentions. Bless her with good friends to encourage her, make her laugh, and be a positive influence on her. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Pray for her relationship with God
“I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
John 15:5 (NIV)
Helping our tween daughters form and grow in a relationship with God is the most important task we have as Christian parents. More than anything, we want our children to know God as their personal Savior and realize that in and through Him, they will accomplish great things.
The tween years bring big changes for children as they edge toward becoming more mature, and this is the perfect time for them to start growing in a relationship with God.
Try this prayer for your tween daughter:
“Heavenly Father, continue to open my daughter’s heart to you. Pursue her, Lord, and help her to come to know you as personal Savior or to grow to know you even more. In the name of Jesus, I rebuke any spirit standing in between her and you. Draw her to you and reveal yourself to her in new ways. Give her your strength to stand firm in her faith. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Pray for her future
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
Romans 12:2 (NIV)
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As our tween daughters grow and mature, they have decisions to make that will impact their future. These decisions start in middle school and continue into high school as they decide about their friends and their classes. They get even more serious as she starts making decisions about her career and life goals.
Praying for our daughters’ future is important. She doesn’t know the challenges that will come her way, and neither do we. But we can start covering her in prayer now to face those challenges and to know God’s will for her life.
Try this prayer for your tween daughter:
“Dear God, help my daughter to stand firm in her relationship with you now and as she grows. Give her wisdom and discernment to form the best relationships and make the right decisions for her future. Help her to seek and find you. Renew and refresh her mind throughout these seasons to be open to your plan for her life. Lord, I ask that you open and close the right doors for her according to your will and plan. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Pray for her relationship with you
“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.
They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.”
Proverbs 1:8-9 (NIV)
During the tween years, kids can start to pull away from their parents a bit. We want to keep our relationship with them strong. I strive to make sure lines of communication stay open with my children. As a tween, my daughter was sometimes better able to talk to me through a shared mother-and-daughter journal. And I loved the chance to thoughtfully and purposefully connect with her.
We parents want to remain a positive influence in our tween daughters’ lives. We want to help guide them on their journey and support them along the way. Figuring out the best ways to talk with our tweens should be a priority. Praying for your tween daughter’s relationship with you is important.
Try this prayer for your tween daughter:
“Heavenly Father, I ask that you be with my daughter and her relationship with my spouse and me. Help her to feel at ease in talking with us and know she can trust us. Guide us to have the right words and actions to communicate with her and listen to her. Help our relationship with our daughter to grow and thrive now and in the future. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
Additional Resources
Prayers for your children prayer cards (for sale on Etsy)
Powerful Prayers for Your Daughter: Praying for Every Part of Her Life by Rob Teigen, Joanna Teigen
Six Ways to Keep the “Little” in Your Girl: Guiding Your Daughter from Her Tweens to Her Teens by Dannah Gresh
Bio:
Stacey A. Shannon is a freelance journalist and blogger. You can find her at Families With Grace, where she writes about faith and family to encourage parents to create homes filled with grace, love, and faith.
NIV – Scriptures taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version®, NIV®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.™ Used by permission of Zondervan. All rights reserved worldwide. www.zondervan.com The “NIV” and “New International Version” are trademarks registered in the United States Patent and Trademark Office by Biblica, Inc.™