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Are You a Godly Friend? What Godly Friendship Is and Isn’t

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Are you a godly friend?

I’m going to be honest with you today. I have very few true friends. Even fewer that I would call a godly friend.. I could say that it is because I moved halfway across the country a few years ago and since, I work from home, I don’t get out much to meet new people. If I’m being honest, though, the reason I have few true friends is because I don’t try. Yep. I said it. I don’t try. I mean, I have good intentions when I meet someone new, but somehow fall short on the actual being friends part of it.

Are You a Godly Friend_

Dictionary.com defines friendship as: The state of being a friend so that begs the question, what is a friend? Again, dictionary.com defines friend as:

 a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.


a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter:

friends of the Boston Symphony.


a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is nothostile:

Who goes there? Friend or foe?


a member of the same nation, party, etc.


(initial capital lettera member of the Religious Society of Friends; aQuaker.


a person associated with another as a contact on a social media website:
are you a godly friend
I have included all of the definitions (especially in regard to social media) to illustrate that the dictionary doesn’t really have a complete picture of what a friend really is. The Bible, however, does. Let’s take a look at what the Bible says about friendship, specifically what godly friend is.
Are You a Godly Friend_


 What is a godly friend?


Proverbs 18:24 ESV

A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.


Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 ESV

Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.


John 15:13 ESV

Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.


Proverbs 27:17 ESV

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.


1 Thessalonians 5:11 ESV

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.


I’ve included just a few here, but, as we can see being a friend, according to the Bible means laying down your life for your friend, encouraging and building one another up, “sharpening” another, lifting another up – even keeping each other warm!



How do you do with those things? Think about your circle of friends. Would you lay down your life for them? Do you speak encouraging words and build them up? Do you sharpen each other? For iron, or knives, you sharpen them by running two blades together – how does this relate to your friendships?


One of the best examples of true friendship is demonstrated in the friendship of David and Jonathan, son of Saul. According to Gotquestions When David was being hotly pursued by Saul, Jonathan sought David out “to help him find strength in God” (1 Samuel 23:16), which leads us onto our second point. Iron sharpening iron is an opportunity to fulfill the Law of Christ. The apostle Paul says that we are to carry and share the issues and burdens that we face daily, to lament over personal sin, advise on how best to repent of it, and rejoice over the conquest of it. This is the same “royal law” mentioned in James 2:8, where we are exhorted to love one another.


What a beautiful picture of friendship! I do have one true friend like that. We see each other usually just once a year as we live 1100 miles apart, but I know, without any hesitation, that we are that friend to each other.


Ildi and Sue are you a godly friend


After reading about how God defines friendship, I am inspired to reach out to acquaintances from church, godly women whom I admire and take the first step toward friendship. What about you?


Do you have godly friends? Are YOU a godly friend?


I encourage you to pray about this and ask God to reveal to you what kind of friend you are. If you, like me, are short on godly friends, reach out to someone you admire to make that connection and start a friendship. If you have a wide circle of friends, do you lift each other up? How could you be a better friend?


One of the greatest blessings that you can give a friend is to share Jesus with them. If you are nervous about sharing the gospel, I’ve got you covered in this post.


I’ve found some great books on the subject. If you would like to be a better friend or want to develop godly friendships, these are great resources.


Messy Beautiful Friendship: Finding and Nurturing Deep and Lasting Relationships Paperback by Christine Hoover


Never Unfriended: The Secret to Finding & Keeping Lasting Friendships by Lisa-Jo Baker 


Because He Lives,


Susan is a writer, speaker and the creator of Women of Noble Character ministries. She is passionate about helping Christian women deepen their walk with God through Bible study and creative worship and strengthen their marriages.

She lives in rural North Central Missouri with her handsome and hilarious husband and a myriad of dogs, cats and chickens.

Susan runs on Jesus, coffee and not enough sleep.

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  1. Great post! Perfctly timed, too. My husband and I are about to move from Virginia to Hawaii, and making friends will be top on my priority list. This post gave me some verses to keep in mind as I’m branching out in a new community 🙂 Thank you so much!

    1. You are very welcome! I’ll be praying for a smooth move and for God to place you in a wonderful church and community with lots of opportunities for friendship. Thank you for stopping by!

  2. I find it very hard to submit to a husband who is controlling, overbearing and so disrespectful, I try though but with a very heavy heart, may God bless my marriage, I believe and love my family.

    1. Hi, Winnie – I understand that. Did you read the post where I shared my story? My husband was not a believer, was a cheater and an alcoholic. Just pray, sister. I’ll be praying alongside you!

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